Plagued (published on August 24, 2005)

My old self returned, since last week.

Does its return necessitate the displacement of my current self?

Self-doubts plague me, again and again.

Strangly, my mood soars at night.

I find myself leaping in the air, doing karate kicks, laughing to myself.

And yes, doing everything but plunging myself to the depths of those textbooks.

I ask myself today whether its my distance with God that cause this inferior old self to make a comeback. After all, it was God who helped me to shred off that old rag, helped me out of it and flung it into the skies. Strange. Having typed these words, why do then I doubt Mr God’s existence? It was me who acknowledge his help. It is also me who ignore him… So there’s a God after all.


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