Manly Women and Girly Men

I was watching the TV series “The Restaurant” where celebrities are invited to head up a kitchen and cook for diners and food critics. The identity of the celebrity for each episode is not revealed to everyone until the very end of the show. During the course of the dinner, you can hear different people in the restaurant guessing, for a start, the gender of the celebrity and some go on to hazard a guess at the real identity of him/her.

What’s especially interesting to me is that the diners seem to make assumption about the gender of the celebrity chef based on the menu. Apparently, for this episode, most of the diners think that the chef is a man because of these dishes:

  • starters: poached egg on asparagus served with hollandaise sauce & pâté served with sour dough bread and chutney
  • mains: venison & lobster linguine
  • desserts: chocolate brandy & custard tart

I don’t get how the majority of the Irish diners associate the above menu with a man. Or in the first place, the association of certain food to a person’s gender. Isn’t that some stereotypical thinking at work?

Which also made me think of masculinity and femininity which are represented by Mars and Venus respectively. And also to some extent, the Sun and Moon respectively. The idea that both concepts are social constructs has been presented to me recently. I have never really thought about that before. But the more I think about it, the more I realise the validity to the notion.

For example, “a man doesn’t wear a skirt”. Except the Scots with their kilts. Except the Asian men with their sarongs. I wonder how did the unspoken rule came about? Who makes the rules as to whether it’s acceptable for a men to wear a skirt? The answer: society. In other words, masculinity i.e. the notion of what a man is is primarily determined by society. This shouldn’t be a surprise to us. But for those who have problems with not fitting into society’s definition of what a man or woman should be, why not be comfortable with your own version of masculinity, femininity or for some of you, gender fluidity?

Oh yes, the celebrity for tonight’s episode is state pathologist of Ireland, Marie Cassidy, a woman.


Quotes from The Curious Case of Benjamin Button screenplay

“For what it’s worth: it’s never too late or, in my case, too early to be whoever you want to be. There’s no time limit, stop whenever you want. You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. And I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you’re proud of. If you find that you’re not, I hope you have the strength to start all over again.”

“Sometimes we’re on a collision course, and we just don’t know it. Whether it’s by accident or by design, there’s not a thing we can do about it. A woman in Paris was on her way to go shopping, but she had forgotten her coat – went back to get it. When she had gotten her coat, the phone had rung, so she’d stopped to answer it; talked for a couple of minutes. While the woman was on the phone, Daisy was rehearsing for a performance at the Paris Opera House. And while she was rehearsing, the woman, off the phone now, had gone outside to get a taxi. Now a taxi driver had dropped off a fare earlier and had stopped to get a cup of coffee. And all the while, Daisy was rehearsing. And this cab driver, who dropped off the earlier fare; who’d stopped to get the cup of coffee, had picked up the lady who was going to shopping, and had missed getting an earlier cab. The taxi had to stop for a man crossing the street, who had left for work five minutes later than he normally did, because he forgot to set off his alarm. While that man, late for work, was crossing the street, Daisy had finished rehearsing, and was taking a shower. And while Daisy was showering, the taxi was waiting outside a boutique for the woman to pick up a package, which hadn’t been wrapped yet, because the girl who was supposed to wrap it had broken up with her boyfriend the night before, and forgot.

When the package was wrapped, the woman, who was back in the cab, was blocked by a delivery truck, all the while Daisy was getting dressed. The delivery truck pulled away and the taxi was able to move, while Daisy, the last to be dressed, waited for one of her friends, who had broken a shoelace. While the taxi was stopped, waiting for a traffic light, Daisy and her friend came out the back of the theater. And if only one thing had happened differently: if that shoelace hadn’t broken; or that delivery truck had moved moments earlier; or that package had been wrapped and ready, because the girl hadn’t broken up with her boyfriend; or that man had set his alarm and got up five minutes earlier; or that taxi driver hadn’t stopped for a cup of coffee; or that woman had remembered her coat, and got into an earlier cab, Daisy and her friend would’ve crossed the street, and the taxi would’ve driven by. But life being what it is – a series of intersecting lives and incidents, out of anyone’s control – that taxi did not go by, and that driver was momentarily distracted, and that taxi hit Daisy, and her leg was crushed.”

A bike crash

I was drunk. Was riding a bike. Slammed into a lamp post. Fellow cyclists yelled at me “Are you all right?” “Yeah” I replied. “Are you sure?” “Yeah” I replied. My bike doesn’t work anymore. I wheeled it to the tram stop. It still doesn’t work. Moving the pedals doesn’t move the bike. I had to pay for a tram ticket back home. Shit. I nearly lost my life.

Steve Jobs – here’s to the crazy ones

“Here’s to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The troublemakers. The round pegs in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They are not fond of rules. And they have no respect for the status quo.

You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them. About the only thing you can’t do is ignore them. Because they change things. They push the human race forward.

And while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do.”

Tarot card readings

Asked the cards 2 questions today:

Question 1 –  Will I find love?
Answer – The lovers card (it was the lovers in the Osho Zen tarot deck)


Question 2 – Will I continue to live in Ireland?
Answer – 10 of cups (it was 10 of water aka harmony in the Osho Zen tarot deck; Alan Ross from Aeclectic Tarot described harmony beautifully: “What is harmony? Harmony occurs when you flow with the rhythms of the universe, instead of struggling against it. When you allow yourself to be simple and soft, not determined to impose your expectations and desires on the Universe, but bending and flowing with whatever you are experiencing, struggle ceases and harmony arises.”)



I just need to trust in life. Which is represented by this card: